Disney Dunces

My Favorite Martian (1999)

Dad nab it, the boys at it again! This time with a film so daddy, it’s out of this world - literally! The Summer of Dads™ is strong with this one. ...alright, confession time, I’ve not actually listened to this one, so summarizing it would be an impossible task. All I can say for sure is that it involves Marvin and is thematically on point. It’s that one film that you’ve certainly heard of in passing, My Favorite Martian!

Hamilton

You’re currently at a crossroads. You can either boot up the ol’ Disney+ and watch a piece of American history come to life through the magic of musical theatre, or alternatively, you can listen to these three nobodies review their high school history class. Honestly though, you should probably just listen to Weird Al’s medley and save yourself a few hours. It’s Hamilton! Or as Disney likes to call it, $75 million well-spent.

Up

The Summer of Dads™ is holding strong, and what better way to celebrate than to cover the strongest dad out there? That’s right ladies and gentlemen, the Bronze Eagle has landed! But what happens when this super dad’s not-so-super son lets his father's greatest weakness slip? Does young Scott Marshall have what it takes to right his own wrongs and become the hero that his dad always knew that he could be? Find out in this exciting look at the classic DCOM, Up, Up, and Away!

A Goofy Movie

Looks like the Summer of Dads™ is in full swing, and what better way to celebrate the season than with a dad that really knows how. To swing that is, like he really knows how to swing. Because at the end of this, isn’t promiscuity truly the first step in becoming a dad? It’s a rather silly film, A Goofy Movie! 

Artemis Fowl

Once in a blue moon, a film comes along that is simply indescribable - mainly due to the fact that all you can think about is that one scene where Josh Gad pulls his pants down, shovels piles of dirt into his mouth, and proceeds to shoot it OUT OF HIS ASS. But what else do you expect from a Tony award nominated thespian? It’s the DPOM that's got us all begging for more, Artemis Fowl!

Tarzan

Oh boy, you’d think an animated George of the Jungle movie would have a few more jokes and a lot less murder. But hey, maybe the humor in this one is just too sophisticated for anyone to pick up on. Maybe in twenty more years all this tragedy will look a lot more like comedy, and we’ll all owe Phil Collins an apology. It’s Disney’s Tarzan!

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… The second trilogy in a trilogy of trilogies finally comes to an end. And all we really have to show for it is one good joke ten seconds in and the key to getting Richard to kill any child of your choice. But hey, maybe that’s enough for some people. So get ready to hide your kids and to hide your wives, as its Disney Dunces: Episode LX - Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith!

Cheaper by the Dozen

What happens when a corporate Twitter account reaches out to a bunch of celebrities to comment on a film that they were in over seventeen years ago, and none of them bother to reply? In a perfect world, nothing at all, and we would all just go about our day as usual. Sadly though, the year is 2020 and the world is far from perfect. It’s Disney's 20th Century Fox’s Cheaper by the Dozen!

Inside Out

Do you ever look at someone and wonder, “What is going on inside their head?” Well wonder no more, idiots, as the fine folks at Pixar laid it all out for us over five years ago. But if you’re still having a hard time grasping the concept, listen to these three nitwits dumb it down for you, perhaps a little too much. It’s Disney and Pixar’s Inside Out!

The Disney Family Singalong: Volume 2

Hey look, they did the thing again. You know, it's like a Youtube compilation video of Disney song covers, but with more ads, but like a second time. If you need more info than that, then you’re dumber than these guys. Just be sure to remember, "In Pod We Trust". It’s Disney’s The Disney Family Singalong: Volume 2!